Still Looking
by Terri4
Summary: Michael is still looking for her....Maria
1. Default Chapter

Title: Still Looking

Title: Still Looking

Author: Terri

Disclaimer: Yawn, not my characters….etc….etc….etc…

Summery: Maria is gone but Michael is still looking

Sequel to Maybe, you didn't think I'd leave at like that did you?

Part 1

It's been two years since she's been gone, two years I've been looking for her, I still don't believe she's dead, I think of her as in limbo, waiting for me, it's been two years since I've been back to Roswell, I won't go back until I find her.

He was in Denver now, he'd lost count of the towns he had been in, he lost count of the faces he had looked at, a few times he thought he had seen her, she'd be walking down the street but when he called her name, she didn't answer, and when he turned her to look at her face, it was never hers, he hoped that one day when the girl turned it would be her face looking back at him.

His stomach rumbles he needed to eat, he couldn't remember the last time he had eaten proper food, he came to a café called the Ranchers, he sat at the booth and looked at the menu, steak, steak and more steak, guess I'll have steak then.The waitress came to his table, "so what can I get ya?" Michael looked up at her, he always hoped that the next waitress would be the one, she wasn't, he sighed deeply, "ummm…I guess I'll have the steak and coffee, strong coffee." The waitress popped her gum and sauntered away.

Michael looked out the window, and daydreamed about the day he would finely see her.

His food had come and he found that it was quite good, the coffee though was crap, well nothings ever perfect. The door of the café swung open and a girl with flowing hair ran into the place, Michael caught a whiff of something that he couldn't quite put his finger on "Joe, I've come for my pay check, is it ready?"Michael jerked upright, My god that voice I'd recognise it anywhere, I looked at her but her back was too me, please god, please let it be her. "Here you go Alice, your bonus is in there too,""thanks Joe, see ya next week,""enjoy yourself Alice you deserve it."Alice leaned over and gave Joe a quick kiss on his cheek, she turned but she was looking down at the money in her hands. Michael still couldn't see her face, his heart was thumping in his chest, could it be her?

Just as Alice neared the door she could feel someone looking at her, she looked up just as she took hold of the handle, she turned her head to the left, and she saw him, he was good looking in a rugged kind of way, shame she was going away today, he was cute, she gave him a bright smile and winked at him and walked out the door.

Michael sat frozen in his seat he watched her smile and wink, then she left, his eyes never left her as she got astride a black motorbike, she was putting on her helmet, when he suddenly jumped up, threw money on the table and ran out of the café, as he reached the pavement, Alice pulled away from the kerb, Michael shouted her name…….Maria.

TBC


	2. Still Looking Part 2

Still Looking

Still Looking

Part 2

Michael jumped onto his bike, pulled on his helmet and screeched away from the kerb, My god it was her, he knew it was, he followed down the same road she did, but he couldn't find her, where the hell was she, he sped up. No way was he going to lose her now, she was alive, she was his Maria. 

For 30 minutes he followed the same road, he couldn't see her and he was going over the speed limit, maybe he had missed a turn-off somewhere back there, he was just about to slow down to turn around and go back when he noticed a black speck about half a mile ahead of him, in his heart he knew it was her.He speeded up and within 10 minutes he had caught up with her, she handled the bike like and expert, he pulled up beside her, he looked at her, and motioned his head to her, she lifted her visor and looked back then nodded her head to him.They rode side by side for about another two hours, then Michael noticed a roadside café, he pointed it out to her and they both slowed down to turn in.

They stopped in the parking lot and Alice/Maria pulled off her helmet her hair tumbled around her shoulders and she pulled it away from her face, she looked at him, as he pulled off his helmet, "hey you're the guy I saw in Ranchers aren't you.""Yeah, that's right, and you're the girl that winked at me," she smiled at him, "the name's Alice." She held out her hand to shake his, "and you, what's your name?" "um Michael, my name's Michael." He took her hand and shook, his stomach did a flip, then a nosedive, she didn't know him, why didn't she know him?

"Well I'm starved, how about we go share a table Michael," god he always loved the way she said his name, "sure why not."

They got a booth by the window, they sat opposite each other, Alice looked at the menu, she bit her bottom lip as she studied it, Michael couldn't take his eyes off her, he jumped guiltily when she snapped her menu closed, his eyes darted to his own menu, she smiled she knew he had been watching her. The waitress came for their order, Alice looked up at her and said, "I think I'll have the omelette, what about you Michael.""What? Oh I'll have the same." As the waitress turned to get their order, Michael said, "do you have any Tabasco?""Sure honey, coming right up.""Tabasco?"Michael blushed slightly, "yeah, it makes food taste so much better, you should try it.""I don't think so…thanks any way." They sat in silence for a while, Michael was the first to speak, "so Alice where you headed?""Nowhere in particular, I thought I would just ride and see where I'll end up, it's my vacation, no work for the next week. And you where you headed?""same as you, wherever the road takes me I'll go, I don't have a job at the moment, I tend to do odd jobs, then when I've enough money I move on.""So you're a bit of a loner, just like me, I don't have many friends but that's just the way I like it."Her eyes became sad at that, Michael looked at her, what happened just now? Where did the spark go that was in her eyes only moments ago. Their food came and for the next ten minutes they ate in silence, Michael wondered how he was going to persuade her to let him come along with her.What he didn't know was that Alice was thinking the same thing, although she liked her own company, she felt comfortable with him, she actually felt safe, she couldn't remember the last time she felt that way about anyone.This could turn into one hell of a trip…….

TBC…


	3. Still Looking Part 3

Still looking 

Still looking 

Part 3

They finished their meal and walked outside, when they reached their bikes Michael turned to her, "I know we just met, um, but how about we ride together, I wouldn't mind the company," Alice looked away then, Michael cursed himself, don't blow it, "Sorry, I'm I pushing it, I just thought…""No, no, it's okay, it's just that I was thinking the same thing,""really, okay then, so where do you want to go?""Why don't we just keep on this road and see where it takes us."Michael smiled at her and nodded his head, he pulled on his helmet and looked towards her, just take it slow, Maria is here with me, I will find out what happened.

They rode together, sometimes when the road was quiet they rode side by side, they stopped a couple of times, to get gas and to get refreshments, when they did speak it was mainly about places where they had both visited, and Michael told her about the different jobs he had, he never mentioned Roswell, she never talked much about herself, whenever he asked she was non committal and changed the subject back to him.

They had been riding for a while and were now looking for somewhere to stop for the night, they found a small campsite and decided this would be the best place to stop, Alice was glad, even though she felt safe with him on the road, she didn't know him and she felt relieved that if he turned into a creep there were people around she could as for help.They found a clearing and stopped and got their things off the bike, it was a warm night and although they both had tents, they decided to just use their mats and sleeping bags, and sleep in the open.Michael laid his sleeping bag next to hers but not too close, she looked like she needed some space between them, but close enough so that if she decided to skip on him he would hear her.

Some campers were having a barbecue and one of the kids came over and asked them if they would like to share with them, they had music playing, the people were very friendly and made them feel welcome, they handed them food, way too much food, the ladies of the camp decided that they were way too thin and needed plenty to eat, they were offered beer, both declined and had soda instead, after eating they couldn't move, they felt too bloated to do anything but watch the other couples dance and chatter, almost two hours had passed and they were tired, Alice kept yawning, Michael noticed this and stood he took her hand and pulled her up, "come on, you look like your ready to collapse, you need to sleep," Alice just nodded her head, she didn't have any energy to argue with him, she let herself be pulled along, as they walked past the others, they waved and thanked them for the food, they waved back and one of the older ladies said to her companions, "young love eh, can't keep up with us oldies."They all laughed as Alice and Michael walked away hand in hand.

No sooner had crept into her sleeping bag she was asleep, Michael turned in his, watching her, he couldn't believe it, he had found her, all this time he knew in his heart she wasn't dead, he knew he would find her again one day, but what he didn't understand was why she called herself Alice but mostly he didn't know why she didn't recognise him, he hadn't changed that much in two years, he wouldn't let himself change, he wanted to stay the same way, so that when he found her she would know it was him straight away, but she didn't, why?He lay back and closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

Michael jerked awake, something had woke him up but he didn't know what, he lay still, it was still dark, then he heard a mewing sound from where Maria was sleeping, he looked over, she was moaning in her sleep, she was tossing and turning, he crept over to her to wake her up, he didn't want to wake any of the other campers, he shook her shoulder, she was soaking with perspiration, he tried to shush her as her cries got louder, "Maria, Maria, please, it's a nightmare, come on, wake up."Maria's eyes flew open and she saw him leaning over her, she gasped and flung herself away from him, "hey, hey, it's me, its Michael, you're okay, you had a nightmare,"she was trembling, she couldn't focus on his face, she felt herself being pulled into his embrace but she struggled to free herself from him, Michael let go and sat back from her, "are you okay?""What did you call me?" Michael remembered then he had called her Maria not Alice, damn, "I called you Alice." "No, no you didn't you called me Maria, I know you did,""if I did I'm sorry, it's just that I knew a Maria, and you look similar to her. Sorry I didn't mean to say her name."Stupid, stupid, stupid, could he come up with a lamer excuse? She looked at him, he seemed sincere, she shook herself slightly, she was cold and she was still slightly trembling, she feelings she had when she had the nightmare were now starting to fade, she scooted back to where Michael was and lay down again, this time a little closer to him.

Michael noticed that she was closer, he spoke in a hushed voice, "do you want to tell me about the nightmare?"She was quiet, she didn't speak, Michael sighed and lay back down, how could he help her if she didn't open up to him, he closed his eyes then he heard her whisper, "I don't remember all of it, it's mainly how I feel," her voice broke as she spoke, "Go on Alice, it's okay."Alice took a deep breath, "I'm at a party, I don't know where, I can't see any faces just the sounds of people talking and the music, then I feel someone looking, watching me, then suddenly the lights go out and nothing just darkness, then I hear laughing, it sounds evil, I turn to run away and I fall, then the voice is over me, I try to get up but I can't move, then he starts to touch me, he's…he's…,""shhh, shhh, it's okay, you don't have to tell me,"Michael could feel the rage build up in him, he had to stay calm, he had to let her speak. She sighed, the tears were falling silently from her, "I close my eyes and I pretend it's not me, I pretend I'm somewhere else, then I hear a voice a girls voice it was so gentle, like she wanted to comfort me, she keeps saying 'let me help you' but she can't and her voice fades away from me, and it's too late, she's gone, that's when I wake up," Michaels arms were around her now, she pulled herself away, "sorry, it's only a dream, I'm just being silly," "no you're not, listen why don't you try and rest and I'll watch over you, I don't need to sleep much anyway, I'll keep you safe.""It's okay, I'm not sleepy anymore," "then why don't we talk some more why don't you tell me about yourself, start from the beginning, like where your from, who your folks are things like that."She smiled at him, "that's going to be a very short story because up until two years ago, it is all a blank……"

TBC……


	4. Still Looking Part 4

Still Looking 

Still Looking 

Part 4

Michael frowned at her, "I don't understand, are you telling me that you remember nothing," even though he knew the answer to the next question he had to ask her, "so is Alice your real name?""I don't know I just liked it, the doctors at the hospital wanted to call me Jane as in Jane Doe, but like I said Alice is a lot nicer don't you think?""Yeah, I like it, so what do you remember then?"

She pulled her sleeping bag around her, and looked down at her hands, "I remember waking up at the hospital and when they asked me my name I didn't know, I didn't know the date, what had happened to me, nothing, zip, nada. My body was in terrible pain, I could barely move, when I asked them what was wrong with me, they were hesitant, I kinda got angry that no-one would tell me,"she gave a shaky laugh, "actually I got pretty hysterical and they had to sedate me, the next morning I was a lot more calmer, that's when this really nice doctor called, Dr Lather came to see me," she looked at Michael, he was laughing at her, "I'm sorry, but Dr Lather.""Yeah I know, I did the same thing I burst out laughing too, it did break the ice though, she had the kind of voice that soothes you like in my dream, but at least I could see her face, she had the most amazing eyes, that shone like crystals, and her smile could light up a room, anyway, she was the one that told me how I was found and what was wrong with me."She took a deep breath and looked down at her hands again, "you see, I was violated, you know…..raped…"Michael squeezed his eyes closed, since her dream, he had a feeling that she had been, but he didn't want to believe it until she said it, then he new it was true, "I'm sorry, look you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

Alice looked up and reached over and took his hand, "I'd like to tell you the rest, if you'll let me? You see I haven't told anyone else and I think the time is right, are you okay about that?"Michael looked at her, and nodded he didn't dare speak, else he might just break down and cry in front of her now, he had to be strong for her, he had to let her speak."Anyway, not only was I raped, but the guy who did this also beat me up and stabbed me in the stomach, he left me for dead,"Michael remembered the pains he felt the night he went to Isabel for help, he had felt Maria being stabbed only at the time he didn't realise it. "So how did you get to be in the hospital?""It turned out that the place he left me was where most of the kids around there went to make out, they called for an ambulance and that's where I woke up, not knowing who I was. Dr Lather did loads of tests on me, but there was no scarring on my brain, her conclusion was that somehow I blocked out what happened, but I had also blocked out the everything else too, she called it post traumatic stress, basically I have amnesia. Dr Lather said that someday my memory might come back or I may never know what did happen that night."

Michael looked at her, how can she be so calm, why had she not gone crazy, look at him, before Maria disappeared, all he could think about was trying to find out who he was, what he was and where he come from."So what happened then?""I was in the hospital for about 2 weeks, the police came for a statement, but I couldn't tell them anything and no-one put out a missing persons report so there was nothing more they could do for me, I moved into a hostel, they helped me find a job, when I saved enough money, I bought a bus ticket and ended up in Colorado, I got a job as a waitress at Ranchers, shared an apartment with one of the other girls, I even managed to save enough money for my bike and that brings me to the present. So what do you think? Still want to ride with me?""'Course if want to still ride with you, I think you're the bravest person I've ever known.""You're wrong Michael, if I was brave I would remember that night, I would remember my life before, I don't even know if I have family somewhere out there, so you see I'm not brave, I'm a coward." Her eyes filled with tears and ran down her face, Michael reached over and wiped them away, he leaned over and was close enough to kiss her, the temptation was too great, he had to taste her lips.They kissed.

* FLASH *

Michael kissing Maria, in the Crashdown, Michael crying in her arms after the Hank situation, Michael and Maria dancing at the prom, Alex's bedroom after the funeral then Michael screaming Maria's name the night Isabel connected with her.

* End Flash*

She broke the kiss and staggered back from Michael, her eyes looked dazed, "what the hell was that? What did you do to me?"Michael stood to go to her but she stepped back from him, he stopped and just looked at her and put his hand out, she stepped further back, he dropped his hand, "they were our memories, they were YOUR memories.""That's not possible, you're lying I don't know you, stay the hell away from me."She started to walk away from him, "Maria wait!" She turned then, "what did you call me?"

Michael stepped closer, "Maria, that's your name."Maria shook her head, "No that's the name of the girl you said I looked like.""I said that you looked like her because you are her, your name is Maria Deluca, I've been looking for you for the past 2 years, please you've got to believe me." 

Maria was starting to feel dizzy, she put her hand to her head which was now pounding, "I don't believe you, I don't Ahhhhh…."Maria fell to her knees and Michael ran up to her, "Maria! Maria, what's wrong, please talk to me."Maria couldn't speak for the pain in her head, she felt like she was going to explode, then she gasped and fainted, Michael was going frantic, what had he done, he had hurt her again, why couldn't he just have let it be, why couldn't he have given her more time to get to know him first, and in his mind he answered himself, 'because you wanted your Maria back', but what if now he had lost her for good.

While Michael was calling her name, Maria had flashes going through her mind, she saw images of her life, her dad leaving, her red sneakers, Michael pulling her pigtails, the day Liz was shot, finding out about the aliens, Michael kissing her to calm her down, the images were coming faster now, she saw herself leave a note to all her friends telling them she needed to find herself, then the images went in slow motion and she saw herself being attacked and heard herself scream Michaels name, she heard Isabel's voice and telling her it was too late, she felt herself drift away from Isabel, then she heard Michaels voice again, 'Maria, please come back to me, don't leave me now, I've only just found, I love you so much, open your eyes please'.

Michael held her and was rocking her back and forth, he hung on and said her name over and over, willing her to open her eyes, she moaned and he stopped rocking and looked down, her eyes slowly opened, Maria looked at Michael, she lifted her hand and touched his face it was wet with tears, "Michael, I remember, I remember everything."Michael bent his head down towards her and kissed her, he wrapped his arms around and they clung to each other, Maria turned her head to his ear and whispered "I love you too."


	5. Still Looking Epilogue

Still Looking 

Still Looking 

Epilogue.

It took 3 days before they reached Roswell, Maria wanted to see her mother first, she knocked at the door with Michael standing behind her, when the door opened her mother screamed her name, she grabbed Maria and held her, Maria could barely breath but she didn't care she was home, she clung to her mother both were in tears, Amy looked up at Michael and smiled at him, "thank you Michael, thank you for bringing my baby home."Maria looked over her mom's shoulder and saw Jim Valenti standing there, he had tears in his eyes. Maria said "hi" it was all she could manage to say as she could barely breath from the bear hug.Her mom must have heard her because she let go and looked around, she saw Jim and held her hand out, he took it and then put his arm around her waist."Umm…Maria, there's something you need to know, Jim and I are married, we've been married for a year now, are you okay about this?"Maria looked between them both, she noticed how happy her mother was, who could not be happy for them both, "yeah mom I'm okay about it," Maria walked up to Jim and hugged him, she pulled back in his arms and smiled, "Thank you, for loving my mom."Jim blushed.Michael came into the house and they all went in and sat down, Maria began to explain to her mom and step-dad what had happened, all the while Michael held her hand passing on his strength to her….

After telling her story, and telling about how Michael found her, Amy sat weeping for her child, Jim held her.Maria and Michael stood and were leaving when Amy called her name, "you are coming back again aren't you? You won't leave again will you?"Maria walked back and knelt down in front of her, "I'm here to stay mom, I'm going to see the others then I'll come back, I promise."Amy smiled then and Michael and Maria left.

Michael looked at Maria, "that was tough, so, are you sure you want to do this now? We could wait until tomorrow if you want.""No Michael, I want to see them. Lets leave my bike I'll ride behind you, if that's okay with you.""Come on, hop on."

When they pulled up to the Crashdown, Michael took hold of Maria's hand and kissed her palm, he squeezed her hand and opened the door, there in the booth sat all of their friends, all the people that they cared about, Isabel was the first to look up, she screamed his name and the others looked over, then Isabel saw Maria, she flew over to her, pushed Michael out of the way and hugged her, "I thought you were gone forever, I thought I'd never see you again," Isabel was crying, Maria was shocked she'd never seen her like this before, Maria pulled back and looked at her with tears in her eyes, "Isabel thank you, you saved my life," Isabel shook her head, "I thought you were dead, you told me to let you go, I thought you were gone.""Nah Isabel, I was just sleeping, I was just waiting for Michael," Maria looked at them all and smiled at the faces she had missed for so long, "I went to find myself, but it took something tragic to happen to make me realise that it was here in front of me all the time, you guys are the ones that make me, me, thank you, now where's the waitress I'm starving."They all started to talk at once and the noise was deafening, Maria looked over to Michael, they just looked and smiled at each other. Everything was going to be okay, they would tell them about what happened, but for now they were just happy to be all together, this was their family.

End.

I hope this was the ending was to your liking.


End file.
